The past two weeks have been a flurried excitement of whirlwinded-buzzing. Ain’t that a mouthful? Translation: School has started back up and I’ve been busy : /
In the hurried and chaotic rush that is my life at times, it’s easy to focus on all the things that I can’t and don’t have/feel like doing. How many times have I heard myself muttering:
- I can’t blog tonight because I have or am _______ (Pick one: Too much school work / too tired / too hungry)
- I don’t feel like exercising because it’s been a long day and I just want to rest on the couch.
- I can’t hang out with friends because _________ (Again: fill in the blank by picking one from the list above)
- I can’t go to that event because ______ (Again: you know what to do. Get to filling!)
- I can’t go to the _____ (movies, salon, nail shop, etc…) because I’m a broke doctoral student.
- I can’t / don’t feel like doing this reading or writing this paper tonight. Because I just don’t feel like doing it. Don’t these people have more things better to do than to assign pointless work?
The list could go on and on. And most days, it does. But, over the past few days, I’ve had to stop myself.
There are a lot of things that I can’t or don’t feel like doing but how long can I really let that be my excuse to not allow myself to do the things that I love or that are good for me? If what they say is true and academia is really the place where fun goes to die, then I’ll have to wait a year before I can do “me” again. And by then, I’m sure I’ll have another excuse: work, friends, boyfriends, and eventually a husband and kids. At that rate, I’ll have to wait an entire eternity!
So, I’ve struck a deal with myself. Rather than focus on all the barriers (i.e. the can’ts and the don’ts), I’ve decided to focus on the cans and the dos. That means taking a smaller bite of the big tasks but at least it gets me back to doing “me” and my happy, fun things.
Here’s a few examples to illustrate what I mean:
- I don’t feel like doing my cardio exercise for 30 minutes, but I can walk around the track for 30 minutes.
- I can’t write all of this paper tonight, but I can write the introduction or I can make a solid outline.
- I can’t go hang out with my friend, but I can give them a quick call to say hello.
Not a full-proof plan in the least and some might argue that there’s way too much negotiation going on there 😛
But, I’m looking beyond that to finding out how to keep and do my “happy me” even when life is going at full blast. At least, it puts me back in the position where I Can do Me. So that’s all that really matters.